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Handling the Holidays It seemed like summer was just here but, in fact, October is quickly passing by. It is not too early to start thinking about the holidays. Especially from the perspective of planning ways to lower holiday stress. We all look forward to the spending holidays with friends and family, having some time off and enjoying good food. The cost of all this can be high because of stress, over-eating and over-spending. The holidays involve many things out of our control. In and of itself, lack of control can cause stress, depression and upset. You may not be able to control the snowstorm that keeps your flight grounded for Thanksgiving. It can be hard dieting while visiting family for a holiday. Sometimes there are tough choices that have to be made. Do I buy those extra gifts the kids want or save the money for the increase in health insurance premiums? There are things that we don't have control over but we often have more control than we acknowledge. Here are some tips to consider during the holiday season: Spending and gift-giving: Determine a realistic budget and keep to it. Try to focus your true feelings on the significance of gifts. Don't feel that you have to give a gift to Aunt Betty that is of equal value to the one she gave you last year. Consider giving things that you have made or cooked. Offer gifts of your time when possible. Your sister and brother-in-law may enjoy you babysitting so they can have a night out more than any material gift you could buy. Don’t impulse buy. Start shopping now to spread the cost over 2 months. If, traditionally, family members buy gifts for everyone in the group, try suggesting this year that names are drawn. Avoid using credit cards if you tend to overspend. Pay cash or use a check or debit card. Some additional ideas are:
Coping with Holiday Stress Do the holidays find you at the end of your rope? Depending on your background, beliefs and family make up a person could conceivably celebrate Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa and New Year's. That is a lot to squeeze into six weeks! Additionally, in may occupations the end of the year brings unique work procedures and tasks. What can a person do not only to survive the holidays, but also enjoy them and feel renewed in January? Here are some things to consider: Food and Stress: Food is an integral part of our holiday traditions. Some people interpret the holidays as not being celebrated unless there are specific foods served. Often celebratory foods are also the ones most laden with fat, calories, and sugar. Most people anticipate gaining a few pounds during the holiday season. For most though, what goes on doesn’t come off. Being able to maintain a balanced eating plan without forgoing favorites is important. Setting some limits for yourself…and following them will help. Just cutting portion size will make a huge difference. If you have a sweet tooth, then don't have them around the house. There will be plenty of opportunities to indulge at work parties, friend's homes and the local Costco. If you are responsible for a meal or food item seek out recipes that contain healthy ingredients. Seek out healthier substitutes for the pound of butter or 3 cups of sugar. Drink a large glass of water before meals. Allow your stomach sufficient time to let the brain know it is full [typically 15-20 minutes].Many people eat to relieve stress. If you find your constantly full but are missing the taste then stress may be inducing the consumption. Find alternative ways to dealing with stress. Exercise: Exercise is beneficial year-round, but especially helpful during the holidays. Exercise helps maintain an appropriate weight and helps relieve stress. Often exercise is the first thing that falls by the wayside when all the holiday extras have to occur. Try walking in the morning before demands eat up your time. Even better, get a friend or neighbor to walk with you to keep you motivated. Buy yourself a quality pedometer and challenge yourself to have a daily goal of steps. Even better, get your friends and family pedometers as gifts and start a walking tradition. Alcohol: Just like with food the holidays bring more opportunities to indulge. Alcohol is a depressant, high in calories and low in nutrients. In addition, half of all traffic deaths in the US are alcohol related. There are many social situations where not having a drink singles you out. Here are some tips to consider:
It is important to remember if you are hosting a party that in most states you become responsible for the actions of anyone you serve alcohol to. Stress: It is easy to get caught up in the frenzy that comes with the holidays. Try to avoid shopping at peak times. Some people are finding that Internet shopping is one way to avoid crowds. Set realistic expectations for yourself and others. The dream of a perfect holiday with everyone getting along, having fun, and being one with the celebration is just that, a dream. If family gatherings have historically been stressful don’t think that this is the year it will all work out. If you historically strive for perfection, try to limit expectations on yourself during the holidays. Your house does not have to look like a magazine cover. No matter how hard you try to find the perfect gift someone will be disappointed. Be sure to take time out for yourself. Exercise can be a great stress reliever. Focus on you and what you want out of the holiday and strive to achieve it. If there is traditionally a family expectation that everyone travels to one point in the country to be together consider if this best meets how you want to spend the holiday. Many families are together for holidays and miserable because of tension or unresolved issues. Some additional ideas to consider:
Overeating: Unless a person has willpower of steel it is hard to get through the holidays without gaining weight. Statistically, the average person will gain 5 to 7 pounds over the holidays. During the holidays we can usually find food wherever we go: cookies at work; pie at mom's; hot cider and cheeses at the neighbor's, etc. Then there are office parties, neighborhood get-togethers, and progressive dinners. Consider talking to co-workers about limiting food brought to work for the holidays. Head up the food committee for the office Christmas party so you have some say in what is served. Willpower is important when monitoring calories. But denying you things can backfire in a meltdown of dozens of cookies and 2 pints of ice cream. Consider trying bits of different things to satisfy your taste and cravings. Have plenty of healthful things on hand when you are hungry. Set some goals for yourself and reward yourself when you reach those goals. Start a workout routine now instead of in January when everyone else starts theirs. Other ideas to consider:
Holidays and Grief Holidays are difficult for people who are grieving. The loss of someone makes the holiday season difficult. Grief isn't limited to the death of a loved one. Grief occurs whenever there is a significant loss. The break up of a relationship, even if it was months prior, can be difficult during the holiday season. Loss of a job, a move to a new city or health issues can affect how a person handles the holiday season. Death: The death of a loved one is hard at various times of the year, but especially at the holidays. Our culture embraces the concept of family and togetherness. It is important to be able to communicate need about how to celebrate the holiday:
Making changes to holiday traditions can be helpful in easing the grief:
Often our greatest comfort during a period of grief is doing something for others:
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